Essay

Of the Taco: An Open Letter to Taco Bell’s new sauces

Dear Taco Bell, There are few places a part-time vegetarian of Hispanic origin can get Mexican-type food quickly. McDonald’s rolled out a chicken wrap in a tortilla, but that, of course, contained meat. Burger King, Wendy’s, and Arby’s? Not a single item that appeals to the brown in me. Now, Carl’s Jr I have to …

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Adventures / Failures in Pop Fiction ~or~ It’s all been done before

  -witch / wizard school -vampire romance -vampire school – witch / wizard romance – zombie apocalypse -nuclear apocalypse -asteroid apocalypse -star-crossed lovers -feuding family -alien invasion -elf kingdom -mythical animals -time travel -lonely cowboy -traveling girl -cowboys vs. aliens -unlikely romance -talking animals -talking fruit and vegetables -freak weather -weather involving food -toys come …

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Before the Hookers

It’s long been argued that prostitution is the world’s oldest profession. Long before there were online reputation agencies, mobile wireless stores, and froyo shops, there were hookers. And hookers have been making a lot of money back then and now. It’s a lucrative job, prostitution, depending on what you get in return. But while prostitution …

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Treasure

How I avoided not reading Treasure Island as a kid goes back to a loner childhood void of popular classic literature yet abundant in a few other sources of… entertainment: Little Golden Books, illustrated abecedarian student encyclopedias from which I wrote most every fourth-grade book report, abridged story book versions of various fairy tales and …

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Sand Trap

If you’ve ever played golf, you’ll understand how frustrating the sport can be, especially if you’re a beginner. You’ll think to yourself: “This is such a waste of time,” or, “What kind of sport allows you to drive right up to your ball?” or, “Wouldn’t this be much better if we just stopped at the …

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